Hold On For the Ride: Standing Tall

Our boy reached another milestone today, and he did it in the presence of dear friends. While having dinner with our friends Erik and Tauni (and their girls Emma and Lily), Matthew learned how to stand up on his own two legs from a crawling position ALL BY HIMSELF. The look on his face when he stood up for the first time was one of delight and pure joy. He knew he had just done something important, even without the many cheers and claps from the eight people standing around him. It was a big moment.

But honestly what delighted me the most about tonight wasn’t Matthew’s standing up (although it was pretty fun to watch). I was enchanted, all evening long, by the love and attention Matthew received from our friends, who are HIS friends now too. They carried him around, talked to him, clapped for him, commented over and over again how adorable he is, and asked us about a million questions about him. This was the first real time they had spent with him, and it was such a gift to me to see how enveloped he was in the friendship and love of this other family.

This happens all the time these days, and it reminds me that our call to adopt Matthew wasn’t just about our family—that we believe strongly that we have an extended family and community who have amazing love to give, and everyone gives it so freely. We knew that when we brought this little boy home, he wouldn’t just have our immediate family, but a whole host of friends and family members who will be part of his life, love him, and cheer him on. This is remarkable to me.

Yesterday, on the Fourth of July, we spent most of the day at my parents’ house celebrating with some of their friends. Matthew got love and attention from three extra grandparents yesterday, who took a zillion photos of him, helped him walk around, played with him, talked to him, and watched him all afternoon and evening. This kid already has four of the most amazing grandparents anyone could ask for, but what a double blessing to have all these extra grandparents (friends of our parents) who are also caring for him and loving him in that same way.

I don’t want to paint a picture of some fairy tale life at our house. Please hear me when I tell you that there are plenty of challenges, obstacles to overcome, and new things to learn. Most nights I literally fall into bed, I’m so exhausted. Aaron is really tired too. Just the change from two children to three is overwhelming, and trying to build attachment with a stranger from another culture is doubly exhausting.

But we are also so mesmerized by all the growing and changing this little boy is doing right here in the midst of us. He has the opportunity for stimulation, affection, attention, and interaction. And this has made a huge difference for him.

I know some of you who read this blog don’t live close enough to come over and tickle our boy in person right now. But we feel your love and support, even from a distance. Your emails, comments, cards, prayers and thoughts surround us and give us strength to keep on this journey, even when at times it feels insurmountable. Please know that you matter—very much. We couldn’t do it without you.