Hold On For the Ride: Maya's Birthday

June 2, 2012

Happy Birthday to our sweet seven-year-old Maya! We will actually go to sleep tonight (Saturday) and wake up tomorrow morning before calling her. It will be June 3 here but still June 2 in Washington. Maya, Sam and my parents are at the cabin near Leavenworth, along with Amy and Parker, to enjoy some Eastern Washington sunshine and swim in the pool on Maya’s birthday. If she can’t be with her parents, I suppose that’s a great way to celebrate.

Of course Maya’s not here with us, but in honor of her birthday, I’ll have Kaitlin include a photo of her cute smiling face, along with the other photos from today. We’ll be home on Thursday, and we’re planning a family birthday party with Maya on Saturday (one week later) to celebrate her in style—pizza and a party in the backyard is her request—and she’ll be thrilled to have her littlest brother home to celebrate as well!

Today has been a full day for us. We left our hotel today just before 10 a.m., heading for Matthew’s physical examination. He will travel to the United States on a Chinese passport with a travel visa from the United States—but the minute he touches down on U.S. soil, he’ll become a United States citizen. I hope we can get a photo of his first steps in the United States—a big moment for him!

We’ve heard nightmarish stories about the physical examination, both from adoptive families of many years ago and from recent families. We found the whole experience today to be relatively benign, although I was hoping the doctor who examined him might have been a little more gentle than he was.

Matthew had a rough 24 hours—I think he has a cold (although it seems to be getting better) and he hasn’t been wanting to eat/drink very much. He hasn’t really taken ANY solid food since we got him, but at least he was drinking from a bottle. But then mid-way through yesterday, he began a bottle strike too, which had me totally freaked out. Aaron realized that it might have had to do with us always holding him while he was eating, which was something we REALLY wanted to do for attachment purposes. But once we allowed him to say on the bed and drink his own bottle, he was back to eating on his own (phew!). We still sit nice and close to him and play with his tummy, feet and legs while he is eating. And unless he’s playing on the floor with toys or sleeping (although he’s been napping between us on the bed), we are always carrying or wearing him. So at this point, we’re letting him eat independently, but hoping to make some progress on that when we get home.

Anyhow, the physical examination was actually pretty routine. Kids over 2 years of age have to have a TB test (that REALLY HURTS!) but since our boy is only 18 months, we got to skip that part. Once again there were so many western families at the physical examination office with their Chinese children—and I looked out at all those children who had no families before this past Monday and gave thanks for their newfound parents and siblings who are so eager to welcome them home. Matthew, of course, is no exception.

After the physical exam, we came back to the hotel room to let Matthew get a good nap. He’s been sleeping A LOT, but we think it’s probably because his orphanage life didn’t help him develop a huge stamina for activities. We wear him out quickly.

However, all our intentional playing has helped him develop some new skills, even in the five days we’ve had him. Since he’s been part of our lives, he can now:

Stand on his legs for long periods of time, sometimes without anyone holding him
Use his left hand more than he was at first (he’s clearly right-handed and prefers that hand most all the time)
Interact and make eye contact with us
Turn his head when we call “Matthew”

I think he’s even getting to know “Daddy” and “Mama,” because he turns to look at Aaron whenever I say something about Daddy, and he also does that with me when Aaron asks him about “Mama.”

One of the most wonderful things about this time in China so far is getting to know Matthew’s little body, as well as all his favorite positions and expressions. The photos we got only really showed us his face—which is really sweet—but now we know how his body moves too. Right now he’s lying on the bed drinking his bottle, and he has his legs drawn up like a froggy in a cute little position. He’s long and lean—it’s funny how much his body lies and falls like Maya’s and Sam’s little bodies did—he feels like a very similar body type to me. In fact, being with Matthew this week makes me think a lot about both Maya and Sam when they were little peanuts. Even I didn’t grow this little person in my body like I did Maya and Sam, I still feel a similar acquaintance with Matthew’s body, his smells, his actions, and his expressions. It’s kind of amazing—hard to put into words—but he totally feels like our kid now. Totally.

After Matthew’s nap this afternoon, we took a long walk through the herbal and pet markets across the bridge (not on Shamian Island), then came back and walked the island a bit. This place has become quite familiar to us, and we are thankful to have spent our first seven nights here on Shamian Island, away from the busy life of the rest of the city. I took some photos to try and capture this place—it’s SO green, and although there are many people on the island each day, it’s still much quieter than the rest of the city.

Tomorrow (Sunday), we move into the city to the Garden Hotel, which is full of adoptive families and we hear has a fantastic kids’ swimming pool. It will be nice to have a little more community, and the Garden is actually a nicer hotel than the one we are in, although the Victory Hotel has been really adequate for us. It will be a good move (things around here are starting to feel a little monotonous) and more than anything, it’s a reminder that we are getting close to HEADING HOME, which we are so ready for. Aaron and I both agreed that we’d go home tomorrow if we could. But Thursday will come soon (we’ll just have four nights at the Garden) and then we WILL be heading home with our boy!